Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘being a grandmother’

Jo 12Recently, I watched our young and very intelligent grandson, as he sat at our table, carefully shuffling that double pack of Uno cards. I offered to help, but he declined—so speedily and insistently that I began to suspect a thing or two. Often when we play this particular game, I have noted how, by some strange coincidence, he ends up with a much higher percentage of those wonderful ‘Draw Four’ and ‘Draw Two’ cards than I do, along with all those ‘Skip’, ‘Reverse’ and ‘Wild’ ones! You see, his card shuffling technique involves nonchalantly turning some over to find out what they are—and then ensuring they are strategically placed in that pack so that they end up in his hand and not mine!

Our Zain often has a wily plan like this in mind—until his grandmother succeeds in foiling it. Yes, recently, even though those cards were stacked, I somehow ended up with two ‘Draw Four’ cards as my final ones to play, thus beating him hollow. What a letdown for him. This time at least, his plans came to nothing!

All of us make plans, big and small, each day—plans that are hopefully much nobler than winning at a card game. Perhaps right now you have already planned out the next few days or weeks or months or even years of your life and have decided what you will do when and with whom. Yet it can all fall apart in a split second, can’t it? Someone becomes ill. Something happens at work that puts our job on the line. People change their minds. The bottom falls out of the economy. On and on it goes. And that’s why I have always tried to take to heart the following warning:

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. James 4:13-14

This past week, on the actual day when chaos seemed to reign in the government of our country and we were unsure who would end up being prime minister as a result, my husband looked at the daily Bible verse that had appeared on his phone for that particular date and read:

Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails. Proverbs 19:21

What a timely warning, we both felt. We can have very grand plans indeed—not only for our own futures but for the future of our country—yet in the space of a few hours, they can all come crashing down. And yes indeed, there seem to have been many such plans brewing in high places in our nation, some no doubt duplicitous and self-seeking, others noble and altruistic. But whatever the case, in the end, God will have the last word. Some politicians may feel they are omnipotent, but sooner or later, their reign will end. Yet the Lord’s continues on into eternity—and ultimately, no one can stand against it.

So whatever your plans and mine, may we always submit them to God, who understands and sees all things and whose purpose for us and for this whole world will ultimately prevail—forever.

Advertisements

Read Full Post »

IMG_20150107_084323086I sat holding our one year old granddaughter as I fed her some dinner. Things went along smoothly at first—but then, as that spoon came close once again, she pressed her lips tightly together and turned her head away. Now I had experienced that tactic before—but it was what happened next that almost caused me to drop spoon and plate and all.

‘No!’ she declared, with great finality.

At first, I thought I had imagined it. Surely she couldn’t talk yet? Of course, I had heard her previous vague attempts at ‘Hi!’ and ‘Up!’ and ‘Boo!’ Now, however, she had said a word I could not dispute—a word she had clearly decided was most useful to have in one’s vocabulary.

I’m sure our little Maxine will have many opportunities to employ this word in the future—much to the annoyance of her parents at times! There will come moments too when it is important she does say it and turn down others who might lead her astray. Even with regard to eating dinner, she seemed to know when she had had enough. But the shock of hearing this tiny word emerge from her mouth caused me to reflect later on how I use it in my own life—for good or for ill.

I wish I had learnt years ago to say no to certain requests a little more often. On occasions, I have too readily agreed to do things—and almost burnt myself out as a result. Yet sometimes I have said no simply because I did not care about someone else’s welfare enough to put myself out for him or her or because I wanted to do something much more enjoyable. And what about those occasions when I have turned God down? How many times has God gently prompted me to take some course of action or challenged me to attempt something new and my immediate response has been a resounding ‘No!’?

I am not so fond of the word ‘obedience’, I have discovered. For some reason, if I am told to do something, I often want to do the exact opposite. I want to reach my own conclusions about what I do or don’t do. I want to weigh it all up and decide for myself. Yet, at this point in my life, I have also realised that, when God calls me to act in a certain way, it truly is much wiser to say yes rather than no. I know I can trust God to lead me well, as Psalm 23 clearly shows. And I know I need to learn from Jesus who always did what his Father called him to do, who chose in that Garden of Gethsemane to do his Father’s will and not his own (Mt 26:39), who did not say no but instead ‘humbled himself and became obedient to death—even death on a cross!’ (Phil 2:8)

I hope our little granddaughter learns to say no when it’s right to do so. But I also hope and pray she learns to say yes to the many things that will be good for her—and especially to God. And I hope and pray I continue to do the same.

Read Full Post »

Recently, I had reason to think more about the great power one particular little word in our English language can wield. Yet this word seems to stick in our throats so often or is too much even to think about saying because the stakes may be too high for us.

Yes, it’s that one little word ‘sorry’.

IMG_20140614_152459Now it appears this is a hard word even for two-year-olds like—well, like our beautiful, little grandson Zain to say. Recently, while visiting us, he did something naughty and, as a result, his dad took him on his knee and decided Zain needed to say sorry. But no—that was not an option for our Zain. Not at all. Time after time, he sat there, shaking his head and refusing to say that one little word that would resolve the situation. Yet how could he, a two-year-old, know how to be so stubborn? What might cause him to decide he was not prepared to stoop so low as to apologise?

Now at that point, his conflict-avoidance grandmother decided to resort to bribery and offered him a lollipop if he would say sorry. But even that did not change his mind. When his dad began to eat that lollipop instead, there were great cries of anguish—but still no sorry. That lollipop began getting smaller and smaller until it had almost disappeared. Yet that little word was never said.

A few days later, out of the blue, Zain apparently said to his mum:

‘Lollipops at Nanna’s house. But I didn’t get one. I didn’t say sorry.’

Even at two, he understood what the issue was and how high the stakes were. After all, a lollipop is a big deal to a two-year-old.

But what about us when it comes to saying that little word? How mature are we about this?  In particular, what happens when we know we need to tell God we’re sorry? There’s much more than a lollipop at stake, in this case. Yet I for one, just like my grandson, so often seem to have too much pride and stubbornness to admit my faults, even to such a loving, forgiving God. On top of that, I seem to have an endless, inbuilt supply of excuses ready as to why I don’t want or need to admit to those ways I have fallen so far short of how God would want me to behave.

It doesn’t matter.

God will forgive me anyway.

It wasn’t so bad, after all.

Others have done much worse than I have.

I’m too ashamed—I don’t even want to think about.

I hope, like Zain, I will grow up one day.  I hope I wake up to myself soon and remember how important it is to keep short accounts with God. I hope I never forget the freedom God’s amazing forgiveness brings when we come before our loving Father with contrite hearts just as that prodigal son did.

How about you? Is sorry a hard word for you to say too—especially to God?

If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, [God] is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 Jn 1:9

Read Full Post »

I love waiting at the airport to welcome someone home. As I do, I often play that game of looking around and wondering which relative or friend those around me are there to meet. Is it a parent or grandparent—or a son or daughter? Perhaps that man is waiting for his wife or his girlfriend. Some look hopefully every few seconds at that exit door. Some have whole families and children with them who are restless with excitement. Others try to act nonchalant, yet little mannerisms given them away. ‘There she is!’ we hear at last—and soon relatives or friends are rushing towards the traveller, whose face has been transformed with joy at the sight of those she loves.

Maxine and Granddad

Maxine and Granddad

It’s a delight to watch such moments of unadulterated joy. I’ve seen them in other contexts too—but this past week, one beautiful such moment caught me by complete surprise. I was sitting holding our six week old granddaughter, Maxine, and talking softly to her. As I did, I noticed how her eyes were fixed on some spot beyond my head. I turned to speak to our daughter—and when I again looked down at Maxine, she was gazing straight at me, with the widest, most delightful smile ever on her cute, little face! No, it wasn’t merely a grimace from some wind that was troubling her. It was one of those fair dinkum, first real social smiles that are just so precious.

I could not take my eyes off her. Her smile transformed her whole face. I noticed too how her eyes were shining, as if lit by some deep, inner joy. It was as if she was saying in the only way she could, ‘Hello! I’m here—and I think I’d like to connect with you.’ It was as if her little spirit was reaching out for recognition and for some sort of special, warm welcome to this world. It was as if some innate sense of joy had suddenly bubbled up inside her. And, needless to say, this grandmother was besotted all over again.

But this experience also challenged me. Years ago, in a very busy period of my life, a good Christian friend told me he didn’t see much joy in me at that point. Yes, we do go through sad and difficult times in our lives when joy may understandably absent for a while—a long while even. But I had no real excuse. I was merely ‘worried and upset about many things’, as Martha was when Jesus was visiting (Luke 10:41). I had forgotten what it was to enjoy God deep down, to allow the Spirit to bring that peace and joy back to my own spirit. After that conversation, I pinned the question Paul asks the believers in Galatians 4:15 on the wall in front of my desk: What has happened to all your joy? Not that I wanted to pretend I was joyful when I was not. But it served as a reminder to rest in God and rejoice in his love. I wanted that inner joy to shine out again and reflect God’s heart to others—and I still do.

How about you?

Let the light of your face shine upon us, O Lord. You have filled my heart with greater joy than when their grain and new wine abound. Ps 4:6-7

Read Full Post »