Being courageous

We have lived in Sydney for many years now, yet there are some parts of our city where I do not willingly choose to drive. One is definitely the airport area, especially the domestic terminal with its current nearby roadworks. I find it slightly overwhelming to be confronted with all those different signs showing me which lane I need to be in to get to that elusive express passenger pick-up area. And if I miss the relevant entry point, it can be tricky indeed, with all those one-way streets, to loop around and have another go.

There can also be one further complication to this whole challenge for me. These days, I find driving at night rather difficult, especially in an unfamiliar area. So you can imagine how I felt when I needed to drive to the airport in the dark recently, not once but twice, in a short space of time. No, I did not look forward to it one little bit.

My first effort went well in the end, however, which was encouraging—although that time, I had someone with me I needed to drop off, which helped. Two pairs of eyes are much better than one in such areas, I have discovered. But coming home, I almost missed the turnoff to the road that would take me around the airport area and back home rather than into the middle of the city. Phew! I am sure those prayers I prayed—out loud—were what saved me and that God enabled me to see where to go just in time.

Then, the day before I needed to return to the airport to pick up my passenger, I happened to come across the following verse in my morning Bible reading:

This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9 NLT

God spoke these words to Joshua after the death of Moses when Joshua inherited the responsibility of leading the Israelites into the Promised Land at last. What a massive challenge indeed to take on! No wonder God had to repeat this command to be strong and courageous to Joshua (see 1:6). Yes, God’s words here are full of challenge, but it seems to me they convey such reassuring certainty and compassionate understanding too.

Now I am well aware that my little foray across town in the dark to the airport bears no comparison whatsoever to the massive task that lay ahead for Joshua. But the reassurance and compassion in these words God spoke to Joshua all those years ago was what I sensed for myself too as I realised how God wanted to reach out to me in my own moment of challenge. So I spoke those same words aloud in my study before leaving home—and several times too during my interesting journey!

The following morning, I had to drive some distance again to speak at a group and a place where I have never been before. As I did, those same words God spoke to Joshua reassured me that God was again with me and watching over me. What a privilege to know God is indeed with us wherever we go and well able to see us through whatever challenges we face!

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The best attitude

I wonder if you can think of a time when someone treated you or spoke to you in a way that made you feel particularly valued and respected. I am thankful to say I can. Perhaps you have had the opposite experience too, however, as I have once or twice, causing you to feel more than a little used or worthless.

Many moons ago, I worked as a casual teacher in various nearby Sydney high schools. Some of these experiences were excellent, but others were far less enjoyable, to say the least! At one school, I asked a girl standing nearby as politely as I could if she would mind moving a chair that was in everyone’s way.

‘Move it yourself!’ she snapped back in a very surly manner. ‘That’s what you’re paid to do!’

At another school, after filling in for a few days in the History Department, I was asked to stay on longer as they had discovered the teacher I was replacing would be away for some time. Not wanting her classes to get behind, I asked the subject master, whose role was to help his staff, for advice on what to teach the classes. I was happy to put in the extra effort required rather than merely babysit them but, since I usually taught Languages, felt a little at sea.

‘Work it out yourself!’ he responded in an angry, abrupt way. ‘That’s what you’re paid for!’

In the end, I did. But I also eventually reported him to the Principal—and never returned to the History Department of that school.

On the other hand, I have experienced some wonderful moments when I have felt so valued and respected. I think of one occasion early on in my writing journey when I was invited to speak at a well-attended women’s breakfast. From the outset, I felt so well cared for. Someone volunteered to sell my books on my behalf so I could focus on speaking. There was a prayer team ready to pray alongside me for others afterwards. And later, I discovered this church had given me what I felt was an embarrassingly generous monetary gift for coming and speaking.

Only recently too, I came away from an online interview with a potential publisher feeling unusually warmed and respected. Later, I realised why. I had been listened to well, had been given time to ask my own questions and, in general, had been treated with kindness and professionalism. What a joy!

This past week, I noticed a simple, little statement in one of Peter’s letters to the early believers that, while clearly being directed at Christian slaves, surely applies to us all today too.

Show proper respect to everyone. 1 Peter 2:17a

No, this is not a command for us to let others ride over us roughshod and rush to do everyone’s bidding. Instead, it should remind us to see others, whoever they are and whether we like or agree with them or not, as human beings created in the image of God, as those loved by God equally as much as we are, as those who have gifts to offer, as those who may well long to feel honoured, respected and loved.

Don’t you feel this is the best attitude to have as we walk this earth together?

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The fine art of promoting oneself

Do you remember a time when you had to blow your own trumpet, so to speak, and convince others you could handle a particular task or fulfil a particular role well, perhaps when applying for a job you truly wanted? It can feel very awkward, can’t it—not to mention downright pushy! 

Ever since my first novel was published, I have had to promote myself in ways I would never have dreamed of doing earlier on. I thought I was becoming more used to it and beginning to see it as merely a necessary part of the writing journey. Yet, recently, I felt daunted all over again when I filled in an author submission ‘pitch’ for a potential publisher of my next non-fiction book I am currently completing. This form consisted of only five questions, but each one necessitated much thought and re-writing. And two in particular made me cringe as I tried to answer them as best I could.

The first of these asked, ‘How will new readers benefit from your book?’ Now, I am indeed passionate about this book I am writing. It deals with the many words we all speak and write throughout our lives and urges us to leave a life-giving legacy behind us when we share them with others. I believe one hundred per cent in the thoughts it contains and sincerely hope and pray they will indeed benefit and build up many of my readers. Yet, it still seems presumptuous to me to declare with certainty, in black and white, ‘My readers will benefit from this book in the following ways …’. What happened to any humility I might have gained over the years?

Another question I sighed over asked, ‘Why are you qualified to be the person to write this book?’ Hmm! I do have a couple of tertiary degrees and diplomas in the areas of language, education, theology and ministry. I have written nine other books and hundreds of blogs. I have also spoken in all sorts of meetings in recent years, had many conversations with people and written countless emails. Yet, surely in stating all this on that form, I would be loudly blowing my own trumpet?

This strange saying ‘blowing our own trumpet’ apparently refers to past days when heralds sounded trumpets to let everyone know the king was coming! Instead, Jesus, our King, set us such a perfect example of true humility and grace when he put everything aside, came to this earth in human form for us and died a criminal’s death (Philippians 2:6-8). What a contrast! And we too are called to have that same heart of humility today.

 Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves … You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Philippians 2:3, 5 NLT

This is the attitude I indeed want to have in all my writing and speaking and in life in general. Yet, we are also called to use our God-given gifts to their fullest extent to bless others and draw them closer to God—and I want to be faithful in doing that too. It can be tricky, to step out in confidence yet also to remain humble—but let’s keep trusting God to show us how.

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Mixed feelings, mixed motives

We are complex beings, aren’t we? Sometimes we think we know why we do the things we do, but then we may discover other reasons lurking beneath the surface. We may try to help someone, yet find in the end our actions are more to make us feel good about ourselves. Or we may give that help in the hope that, when we need help, they will perhaps return the favour. We like to think our motives are pure, but sometimes they can be more mixed than we care to believe, as I myself discovered recently.

Sometime last year, a gentleman invited me to speak at a secular venue and told me I would receive a monetary gift towards my travel costs. I thought that was quite generous as, often in the past, I have received instead either a bottle of wine, which I usually give away, or some chocolates, which I don’t eat! I thanked him, but then enquired whether I could also display my books. This seemed to shock him, however.

‘Well, either we give you the money or you sell your books!’ he told me in a rather incensed tone. ‘But if you want to bring a few, I’ll look the other way.’

I felt like some mercenary criminal. Why he would need to look the other way? I have sold my books at such meetings many times before and still received some sort of gift at least. Besides, any author will tell you writing books is not a good way to get rich quickly—unless one’s book is a bestseller!

This particular meeting was cancelled because of Covid but, when we made a new date, I discovered this man would not be there then. So, I decided to display my books after all and see what happened as far as any monetary gift was concerned.

Nothing did. I sold two books, which of course did not cover travel costs, and returned home more than a little disgruntled.

As I reflected on this experience, however, I began to feel more ashamed than disgruntled. Hands down, if I had to choose, I would prefer to sell my books rather than receive money to cover travel costs. After all, I want readers to enjoy my books and also hopefully be drawn closer to God in some way. Besides, many times I have happily spoken at different places, well aware there will be no monetary gift afterwards. Yet this day, I sensed my motives had shifted a little.

In the end, I decided to sit down and remember who gave me the gifts of writing and speaking and who has enabled me to do both for years now. I might not have made a great deal—but I am not in debt either. And I have met many interesting people along the way and learnt so much. Soon I began to feel thankful again for my wonderful, God-given, unexpected, later-in-life journey. And I remembered too the verse featured on my website, reminding me to glorify God, rather than seek glory and gain for myself.

Not to us, O Lord, not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness. Psalm 115:1

I hope I keep that wonderful, pure motive in mind more often in future.

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Are we winnin’?

One recent cold, blustery Saturday morning, I headed out to drive to our local shops. I had not gone far, however, when I felt compelled to pull over and get out of the car. You see, I had just passed two older men trying their best to chase after piles of advertising brochures that were being blown everywhere, up and down the road. At first, I thought: ‘It’s not really my problem. Maybe they were careless and dropped them while they were supposed to be putting them neatly in people’s letterboxes.’ But I felt so sorry for them as they ran after those windswept papers that I decided I should help.

Can you picture me diving here and there to pick up those errant brochures? Hmm! A few cars slowed down, as I retrieved some that had blown right onto the road, but no one stopped to help. One can only hope all those young people in particular who decided to keep going had a pressing appointment somewhere!

Feeling decidedly windblown, I huffed and puffed my way back to where the two men were busy chasing after their own piles.

‘Are we winnin’?’ one of them yelled out with a grin.

‘I don’t know, but at least it’s good exercise!’ I laughed back.

I soon discovered the men had not been delivering the leaflets. They had merely seen them fall off a truck right in front of them and had decided they created far too much litter to be left lying on the road. This made me doubly glad I had helped them, but as I drove off, the question the man asked kept ringing in my ears: ‘Are we winnin’?’

The two men and I must have looked ridiculous as we picked up those brochures—I think I even saw some drivers laughing at us while they sped past! We did not look like we were ‘winnin’’ at all—and I for one didn’t feel like we were either. And that is how it sometimes feels with our efforts to love and serve God too, doesn’t it? Sometimes, there seems to be little impact when we seek to use the gifts God has given us. At times, after speaking at some secular event, I wonder if anyone present heard my gentle challenges about faith in God. At times too, I wonder if those conversations at my book table will bear any fruit—or if my books themselves will. Yet I know that is when I need to refocus and remember I have done my best to convey what I felt God wanted me to convey. And I need to remind myself too that I belong to the ultimate, all-powerful Victor who has conquered even death for our sakes.

But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labour in the Lord is not in vain. 1 Corinthians 15:57-58

Whether we managed to retrieve all those pesky brochures or not on that recent windy morning, I suspect we did win. I at least sensed our actions pleased and honoured God—and in the end, that’s what matters, don’t you think?  

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Remembering

One day recently, in the middle of writing, I thought of something I needed to do in the kitchen. Yet there was one slight problem. After heading there, I could not remember what that ‘something’ was! Feeling distinctly foolish, I returned to my writing, hoping enlightenment would soon come.

Not long after, my husband charged into my study to tell me two things. He remembered the first, but the second eluded him completely. Later that day, however, he informed me he had remembered what that second thing was—but had forgotten it again! Oh dear.

A day or so later, that pesky piece of information he had forgotten twice finally surfaced. This time, he remembered it long enough to relay it to me—although whether it was worth the effort is another matter, since I cannot now recall what it was!

This phenomenon of forgetting things has nothing to do with old age, of course. My personal excuse is that I have so many writing ideas in my head there is very little room for other pieces of information, particularly mundane ones. That is why I take great care in recording the various details for my speaking engagements on my laptop—and in my paper diary. After all, I do need to remember such things as what topic I have been asked to speak on, what time I need to arrive, where I am able to park and other necessary bits and pieces of information. This helps counteract the feeling of dread I occasionally experience of one day turning up at the wrong venue or at the wrong time or even on the wrong day!

I think God understands how good we are at forgetting, don’t you? In the Old Testament, God gave the Israelites various feasts and rituals which enabled them to reflect together on God’s goodness and remember how God wanted them to live. Even then, God often had to encourage them, via strong words from their leaders, to remember where they had come from and who had saved them.

Remember that you were slaves in Egypt and the Lord your God redeemed you from there. Deuteronomy 24:18

Remember the wonders he has done, his miracles, and the judgments he pronounced … 1 Chronicles 16:12, Psalm 105:5

You have forgotten God your Saviour; you have not remembered the Rock, your fortress. Isaiah 17:10

We cannot judge them, however, because how quickly we too can forget what God has done for us! I for one know how easily I can slip over into thinking I am in charge of my own life and fail to remember who I belong to. No wonder Jesus instituted the Lord’s Supper for his disciples—and for us—as one tangible way at least of remembering him.  

This is my body, which is for you; do this in remembrance of me. … This cup is the new covenant in my blood; do this, whenever you drink it, in remembrance of me.” 1 Corinthians j11:24-25

We may forget many things, but let’s never forget the Lord. Let’s remember his amazing love and grace and mercy towards us—and be so thankful.

Praise the Lord, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits … Psalm 103:1-2

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A special celebration

Recently, I did something I have never done before. Each day for one whole week, I deliberately chose to do some special activity I have wanted to do for some time but always had a reason not to. On top of that, I did not cook dinner any night that week. Instead, we ate out or bought takeaway. You see, the whole thing was a unique birthday present for me—and what fun it all was!

Originally, my husband had wanted me to enjoy a few days away somewhere by myself—to relax, recharge and spend time with God. I thought about this lovely idea and even looked up various venues online but did not feel settled about any of them. Then one night, it came to me. I did not want to go away anywhere. Instead, I wanted to enjoy different, interesting experiences within reach of our own beautiful unit, then come home and not have to cook dinner! A win-win situation, don’t you think?

In the end, we called this wondrous week ‘The Festival of Jo-Anne’ (!)—and I thoroughly enjoyed it all. I went shopping, twice over. I went to the movies. I had coffee out. I had a massage. I read. And in between, I had time simply to sit and be and reconnect with God. Yes, it was all very good indeed.

But one reason I enjoyed it even more was that, two weeks earlier, I had finally finished the first draft of my latest novel that had languished on my laptop for over three years, waiting patiently for me to unfold the rest of the story. This special week of mine then was also for me a time when I came up for air, so to speak, when I allowed my poor brain to rest, when I graced myself a little more than usual—and when I sensed God’s love and grace being showered on me from every angle. It was a lovely, hiatus period—a time to gain clearer perspective, not only on my novel, before I plunged into all that necessary editing, but on my life in general.

At one stage in writing this particular novel, I wondered if I should keep going. Should I be content with the eight books of mine that have already been published? Was that where God wanted me to stop? But one day, I sensed God saying gently to me, ‘Jo-Anne, whether you write this book or don’t write it, remember I’ll be just as delighted with you either way!’ What gracious, loving, freeing words to hear! I did not need to feel pressured to produce in any way. Instead, I had permission to write the sort of novel I have wanted to write for some time and to leave the outcome in God’s hands.

Yet I think God was saying more than that too. I think God wanted to remind me that, all the time, whether celebrating the Festival of Jo-Anne or writing or speaking or whatever, I can rest fully in this amazing love of God that accepts me, no matter what.

How precious is your unfailing love, O God! All humanity finds shelter in the shadow of your wings. Psalm 36:7 New Living Translation

Maybe you too need to hear this reminder right now?

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Checking those motives

I have discovered that, unless I am vigilant, I can sometimes become a lot more self-focussed and self-serving than I like to think I am. I may gladly agree to do something, but soon those selfish questions I am loath to acknowledge resound in my brain. What will I get out of this? How can I impress others as I complete this task? What if nobody sees all my effort?

Hmm!

One recent Saturday morning, I was ahead of schedule to get to a speaking engagement some distance away, so sat down to check over my input and read my Bible before leaving. I found I was up to the story in John 5 of how Jesus heals a man who had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. This takes place on the Sabbath, so the Jews begin to persecute Jesus—and even more so after Jesus refers to God as his Father (5:17). Yet Jesus still proceeds to explain how he does only what he sees the Father doing and how he has received authority as the Son of  God to give life and to judge others (5:19ff).

Then the following words caught my eye:

By myself I can do nothing; I judge only as I hear, and my judgment is just, for I seek not to please myself but him who sent me. John 5:30

Okay, I found myself thinking—Jesus chose to listen to his Father and not step out in his own strength. And he chose to please his Father rather than think only about his own wellbeing. What a challenge! If Jesus had that attitude in his life and ministry, then surely I should aim to do likewise—especially as I set out to speak somewhere.

I read on, admiring Jesus’ boldness as he addressed those Jews seeking to kill him: ‘But I know you. I know that you do not have the love of God in your hearts.’ (5:42) Wow—how confronting that must have been for them to hear! Yet I personally found his next statement even more challenging:

How can you believe if you accept praise from one another, yet make no effort to obtain the praise that comes from the only God? John 5:44

As I drove to my speaking engagement, I found myself hoping I had heard my Father God well and prepared the message God wanted me to give. But then I asked myself: What are my real motives in it all? Is it just to receive praise from others—or is it to hear that ‘Well done!’ from God deep in my spirit and to know that is enough? Usually after I speak, someone will come and say something positive about my input—and I hope I have learnt to accept this with grace and not let it add to my pride. But if I begin to care more about that than about whether I have pleased God in it all, then something is sadly out of balance in my whole approach.

Sometimes our real motives for doing what we do can be well hidden, don’t you think? Let’s bring them into the light of day and check them out with our loving, caring, gracious God, who does not want to see us go astray.

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Something for nothing

Have you heard of of those loyalty card deals where, if you spend a certain amount for a certain period of time in a certain supermarket chain, you get even more to spend? A few weeks ago, my husband was offered one we felt we could not pass up. It involved receiving a hundred dollars off our grocery bill, if we spent that amount in-store first—as well as spending fifty dollars each week for four weeks in a row prior to this. I was sure I could find enough to buy, so we decided to take part.

What fun it was, buying a hundred dollars worth of goodies! I easily made it to that total—and beyond. In the process, I met some friends who were doing something similar. We congratulated one another—it was as if we were in a conspiracy to wring every last cent out of our windfall. After all, the supermarket chain had done well out of us over the years, so we were entitled to do this.

Later, I reflected further on this experience of getting something for nothing. At least, it wasn’t really for nothing. We still had to spend to get that bonus—we still had to stay loyal to that supermarket chain. Then I remembered how, after speaking somewhere, I have sometimes been given a monetary gift. After one particular women’s event, I received an amount far beyond what I felt I was worth. I was shocked—I actually wondered whether an extra ‘0’ had been added to the amount by mistake! Yes, I had spent hours preparing my input and had put my heart and soul into my message, but I had enjoyed doing it all. They did not need to give me so much—or anything, really. In fact, I felt quite ashamed they had been so generous on my behalf.

These two responses to receiving a gift could not be more different, could they? With the supermarket bonus, we had a sense of entitlement. After all, we had earned it by shopping at that particular store. But with the gift I received for speaking, I felt as if I didn’t deserve it at all. I wonder if these two responses give us a picture of how we can tend to treat the grace and forgiveness God offers us. I have known some people who feel entitled to ending up in heaven with God. After all, haven’t they been to church often enough or lived good lives and not hurt anyone too much? But I have met others too who have great difficulty believing God could love them enough to forgive them and offer them the free gift of eternal life. They don’t deserve it—they feel too unworthy and insignificant—and are unable to accept it.

Both responses are sad, don’t you think? One is full of entitlement, while the other is full of shame. Yes, God has given us something for nothing, something we didn’t deserve, something made possible only through Jesus’ death. We can’t earn this gift of grace. All we can do is come in humility and receive it, then live for God in return, with a heart filled with gratitude.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16

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Unshaken

If there were a degree in playground assessment, I reckon my husband would pass it with honours. He well knows the various criteria that must be met as far as playgrounds go, according to which grandchild one is trying to entertain. The equipment has to be suitable for the child’s age—not too adventurous and not too boring. It is preferable for there to be some shade. There has to be good parking nearby. And it also helps if said playground is not too far away.

Another plus is the presence of a particular piece of equipment we call the ‘basket swing’—that is, a shallow, basket-like circle made of some webbed material attached via chains to the apex of a strong support structure that enables it to swing in all sorts of directions. In past years, our two older granddaughters loved swinging together in one of these. Now our grandson lies back just like they did and is happy to be pushed for as long as Granddad has energy to do so. Sometimes he even goes to sleep in the process. Zain, that is—not Granddad!

I thought of this swing recently when I came across some words in Isaiah, which, while spoken to the people of Zion, God’s chosen children, surely also apply to God’s children today:

Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed, says the Lord, who has compassion on you. Isaiah 54:10

What has this verse to do with basket swings, you may well ask. To my mind, lying back in a basket swing is a wonderful picture of what I believe it means to truly rest in God’s unfailing love. Just as our grandchildren relax and enjoy the ride in this swing, trusting Granddad to keep on pushing faithfully and in a way that is safe for them, so I know I can trust the Lord to be there for me and to go on loving me, whatever might lie ahead.

Yet it is one thing to agree God loves us with an unfailing love but quite another to live as if we actually believe it, I have discovered. Why do I sit here, for example, worrying about so many things if I know the Lord has such compassion for me and is able to keep me in a place of peace, even if everything falls apart around me? Why do I so often forget about God’s amazing love for me that will never, ever waver, however much or little people might value me as a writer and speaker?

So … as 2015 begins, once again I choose live my life secure in that basket of God’s unwavering love, knowing God understands me perfectly, values me so much and will provide for me, whatever happens in the coming year and beyond. When those doubts and fears come flooding in, I plan to choose to rest back in those loving ‘basket swing’ arms of God and allow that unshakeable love to consume me once again.

If you find yourself feeling a little shaky as you look to the year ahead, may you too experience that unshakeable love of the Lord once again that will never fail you, whatever happens.

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